Man's Best Friends Scene VIII

(Mike at Elizabeth's Victorian House, her room by the front door with a window)
Mike (dog): Now to ring the doorbell (reaching for the bell, then stops). Wait I can't ring the bell I have to bark. Man it's a hassle dealing with normal people. (Barks in an obnoxious yelping style, lights turn on inside)
Elizabeth (librarian): (exasperating sigh) That neighbor's dog again. It never shuts up. (rolls over in bed as seen from a window by the front door)
Mike: What the he- I went all the way here from Cardinal no Princeton Road, just to get shut out. Hell no I'm getting in (Tries to jump in through window) Ah I'll just wait at the library. How far is Martin Luther King from here? (Elizabeth opens the front door to let her cat out)
Elizabeth: There you go kitty. (Mike barks loudly chasing the cat as it screeches out of sight) Oh darn Brian's dog what's it's name? Thomas? David? No that's the hamster. Wait Mike (Yells) Mike Mike come on over here (playfully gentle) Come here Mike come on come on over here.
Mike: (turns around) Elizabeth what are you doing here? (walks over to Elizabeth as she reaches down to pet him) Oh yeah she can't hear me
Elizabeth: Ah sweet baby what are you doing here?
Mike: You answer me first crazy lady you can't hear me anyway.
Elizabeth: Stay here until I come back with Bettie my cat (walk down the street to get Bettie)
Mike: I gotta do something about my reaction to cats. Why do I attack them? Was I raised that way? Brian never wanted me to attack but then my biological father had a strong feline prejudice. When did I become him? (Elizabeth comes walking back with Bettie in her arms)
Bettie: Screw you, you dumb mangy mutt.
Mike: I think I found my answer. Didn't even give me time to apologize that ugly puss.
Elizabeth: God it's only five o clock in the morning. I could return Mike before work but I don't know his schedule.
Mike: (sarcastically) I believe he has a business meeting at the office with the tv, the computer and the fridge. (pants in laughter)
Elizabeth: Oh wait today's Saturday. I don't work today. I'll wait until nine and then (lifting and rubbing Mike) I'll take you home.
Mike: (relaxed) Um a cuddler Brian is gonna love you.